Thursday, January 31

My new bed


I fownd this grate thing today that I made into a neet bed It was kind of this tent thing but the holes in the side were so TEEENEY tiny I coodn't git inside even tho I tride reely hard and got stuk So I plade with it and then I sat on it and it kinda wint flat and then I discuverd that IT HAS THE HOTS INSIDE IT TO KEEP MY BIG BOOTAY WARM and so I made it into a bed and I sleep on it winever I sleep I think my Ladey got it for me cuz I am POLITE and always say pleeze and thank yoo just like that bossy Daisy cat told me to and as yoo can see it is dark green and brown wich almost matches my furs I think it will help attrakt hot gerlcats to join my HARUM!!!!

Thursday, January 24

WARE CAN I GIT A RAT????


This rat looks just like my wite rat upstares, ixsept his eers and smaller and he's not as ugly Or stinky Can I order one of theeze over the innernets?? And maybey a dawg to ride on too

Monday, January 21

Me an Rocky are BUDDIES!!!!!!

Me an Rocky spent the day on the ratty cat cowch watchin FOOTBALL!!!! and we HADDED A YABBA DABBA DOO GOOD TIME espeshully becuz Rocky klewd me in to a privite stash of MOTHERS MILK upstares in the rat's red tent.THE MUTHER'S MILK WAS THE GRATEST!!!! and it reely helpt me and my new best frend Rocky BOND but it also made me nap thru the last haff of the football game and now I hafta go an look for a gwakomoley resipey becuz I think me an Rocky gots to invite sum frends and wimmin over for soooperbole sunday

LIFE'S A TRIP!!!

Saturday, January 19

How abowt a combover?

So, Daisy and Daisy MM ganged up on me and maked me give that littul wite rat cat bak his 2PAY boy thoze gerlcats are uppity and BOSSY too it was like yap yap yap yap yap and finely I gave up and I throde the 2PAY bak upstares so now I'm trying to cover up my baldniss with a combover becuz Rocky the geezer sez that sumtimes werks so I likt all the furrs frum one side to the middle of my baldniss and then I likt all the furs frum the other side of my baldniss to the middle and it took neerly all day and even so it didn't make the bald part go away all the way but at leest is isn't as bald as it used to be Rocky sez maybey I shood try blak spray paint next but I can't werk the sprayer with my paws can sumbuddy come over and spray me???? LIFE'S A TRIP!!!!

Wednesday, January 16

I got a 2PAY!!!!!!!!!!

Today I "purrswayded" the upstares wite rat cat to give me his 2PAY
HAHAHAHAHAHA
he kride like a gerl but as yoo can see it hides my bald spot nicely!!!!!
and it's fun to play with!
AND BY THE WAY that reeely hot gerlcat TT gived me a THINKING BLOGGER AWARD



I don't know why she did but it's probly becuz she's always thinkin
HOW CAN I JOIN THAT HOT MANCAT'S HARUM?????

Tuesday, January 15

YIKES!!!!


SINSE I AM SUCH A BIGMAN CAT I HAVE A HARD TIME SQWISHING UNDER FENSES AND STUFF AND IT HAS CAWZED ME TO GO BALD BEEFORE YOO KNOW IT I WILL LOOK LIKE DRAGONHART AND MERLIN!!!!!!!! DON'T WERRY I SKOFF AT PANE!!!!! ROCKY SEZ I SHOOD USE THE OPPERTOONITY TO HAVE SUM GERL CATS COME OVER AND CUMFERT ME AND THAT AN ENGLISH AKSENT WOODN'T HERT SINSE I ALMOST LOOK LIKE JON LEWK PIKARD AND HE MAKES MY LADEY ALL TINGLEY.

Monday, January 14

LIFE IS GOOD!!!!!

The last cuppul of days, stranje peepuls have bin at my howse One of them looks like the TRIPPER DOWN man ixsept he has furs and glass circles on his face and he never sez TRIPPER DOWN And so the not Tripper down man deesided to sleep ON MY BED on the ratty cat cowch wich was fine becuz I LIKE TO BE WITH PEEPULS so I sleeped with him and he had a majik blankie with HOTS inside of it wich ment me and my big booty was vary warm and toasty all nite wich I liked but the not Tripper down man wint away this morning and I think I will miss him cuz he was my best frend EVER ixsept maybey for Monty Q Cat hoo helpt me git my blog!!!!!!

Thursday, January 10

PARKER GIVED ME AN AWARD!!!!!

PARKER gave me a Thinking Blogger Award cuz she sez my blog makes her think whut does she see in me sumtimes Rocky sez Parker is Fie-stee I dunno whut that meens Probly that she's hot And eezy That's how Rocky likes 'em WARE IS MY LADEY???? SHE'S SPENDING ALL NITE WALKING OWTSIDE GOING MAO MAO MAO I dunno why she likes that kranky cat I am obveeusly much nicer to her I HAVE TO THINK OF SOME BLOGS THAT MAKE ME THINK BUT THE TRUBBUL IS I DON'T THINK TOO MUCH ABOWT ANYTHING.

Monday, January 7

Santa Suks

Santa is a meen fat ole man he didn't git my hardly anything on my list and I tride REEEEEL hard for three or fore days beefore Krissmiss to be good for all the good it did me so I did not git a fire truk a drum set a grate tunnul box an AK-47 a Humvee a WEEEEE a tie-die mussul teeshert in many colors or werld peese (sorry MIMI) but I did git a 2-day supply of catnip and sum fether toys and a new skratcher (WICH DUZ NOT MAKE ANY NOIZE OR COME IN BRITE COLORS) and I got to sneek upstares and play KETCH THE WITE RAT with the wite rat hoo can sqweeze into many small openings and skreems like a gerl win I get close to him that Rocky cat sez its not werth it to not have fun all yeer just to keep Santa happy and I think maybey he's rite.

MY BEST FREND MONTY Q CAT TAGGED ME!!!!!

Seven Weird Things Meme
Monty Q Cat tagged me for the seven weird things meme AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHUT A MEME IS!!!!!

The rules are: Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog. Share seven random weird facts about yourself. Tag seven random people at the end of your post, and include links to their blogs. Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

HEER ARE MY SEVEN WEIRD THINGS:
  1. I'm a big boy so it's hard to groom my bak ixsept win my ole' ladey Parker comes over and duz it for me so I git on the stares and I dig my klawz into the carpet on the step above ware I'm sitting then I kind levridge and twist my body arownd so I can tern all the way arownd to groom my bak all the way bak to ware it gits close to my spot 13.
  2. My ladey makes shreeky noizes win I make berds go ded but still she reewards me eech time by adding a bell to my coller this makes me lowd I like lowd.
  3. I LOVE MY MONTY Q CAT BED! Akshully, it started owt by being Mao's bed cuz he wun it but I didn't have an offishul bed just a box so my ladey gave me the bed cuz she likes me best but I'm a big boy as yoo know so I spill owt over the sides but I still LOVE LOVE LOVE MY MONTY Q CAT BED and win I go to sleep at nite, I sleep the hole nite thru withowt waking up.
  4. I like the way my spot 13 smells.
  5. I wood like to lern how to fart!!!!!!!!!!!!! And not SBDs, but the reely LOWD kind that kleer a room.
  6. I like warin hats, espeshully the Yankees cap.
  7. I like to play the peeano and I'm vary good at it.
Now I tag:

Meep and Twiz
Rosie and Cheeto (cuz Rosie is HOT!)
Jeter Harris
Dragonheart and Merlin (cuz Merlin looks YUMMY)
Bonnie and Victor
Jimmy Joe
Boy